I started this as a way to vent emotional strife, trauma, baggage whatever you feel like calling it without having to see the looks of the people I was talking to judging me or disapproving of my feelings or even not understanding at all and having no response, as a way to move passed it, rather than wallow in it or “get over it” as many people would want and expect. There is no judgment here only honesty and bravery.

“there is no love in fear”….Tool

  1. christyna says:

    I seemed to have forgotten to mention that I suffered a first trimester loss in September 2007 and am trying to heal and move on. Up to and including ttc again. I paint, I draw, I do crafty things….considered to be my therapy in my book. I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder at 15 years old. I have a 7 year old son and a boyfriend of 3 years, I’m Divorced and I’m a brutally honest realist…who likes to complain a lot ha ha. I hope it’s enjoyable or at least interesting to read…and most of all I hope it helps someone else heal or at least feel less alone.

    I have since in the past 6 months been more and more depressed. I decided to put TTC on hold, could be 6 months, a year, or never again, to go back on my bipolar meds, which is the best choice I could have made. now i’m just picking up the pieces. waiting for spring and being happier despite the everyday bull that happens to get tossed at me. I am a serious believer in medicating mental illness. I didn’t used to be there is such a stigma. It’s no different than managing diabetes and don’t let anyone ever treat you otherwise. If you want to be happier, a better you and you’re mentally ill go seek help find the medication that works for you and vow to take control of your future happiness. it will make ALL the difference.

  2. creativekate says:

    wow…….i came across your blog some way some how today….i needed it…i HEAR you…i KNOW…i KNOW what much of this feels like. from numerous tats, chopping off and dying of hair,acne @ 30, ups downs, bliss, spirals, trucking this path alone with out meds for longer than i should have…..dude i get it…….amazed by your strength…people tell me that all of the time and i don’t realize that what we are doing requires strength……..

    something that helped me (found through therapy) was to keep a gratitude journal.. i know i know…….but truly….i kept track of ups/downs….always wondering if i was depressed or manic but keeping a gratitude journal made me find a tad bit of happiness in the crappiest of days…….1 rule……can’t write anything negative… sometimes i just read over it…life looks a tad bit better….even if it just reads; rest, soft bed, meds, sugar, and children playing in ANOTHER room. i started a blog and try to keep it on a positive note but trust me i’m not a rainbows out my ass kind of girl!

    hope you are doing well….. kate

  3. Laurie says:

    I really like the idea of a gratitude journal. I was just discussing with my husband last night how I need to learn to appreciate what I have. I think I’ll start a blog for that today.

    Thanks for the great idea Kate.

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